Tomorrow Mike, Michael, Ron, Reiner and I are taking a wild, fun-filled road trip to none other than the illustrious Bakersfield, CA. Now, if you're from my home town that's akin to driving to Anchor Point for a fun-filled weekend (for those of you unfamiliar with that area cringing, gasping, fainting, vomiting or general looks of horror would be acceptable responses). Bakersfield even has a shoe repair store in the shape of a shoe. Hyuck, hyuck. That's soooooo funny. OMG. Heh, heh... (grrrr).
So, um, why exactly are we packing a car with five full grown men (some of whom never got the "time to stop growing" memo) to drive for 3+ hours to white trash central? Well, I'm glad you asked. It's all about the company we keep and the fact that we get to go hang out with the ever entertaining Mike's mom (known to the world at large as "Pat"). She's a riot and the car packed with our own version of the Fab Five should prove for some rather interesting antics all by itself. I'm pretty sure they have huge banners hanging across the streets of Bakersfield right now boldly warning "The Queers are Coming! The Queers are Coming!" Children will be running for cover, frightened tears streaming down their precious little faces. Little old ladies will be pulling out their pepper spray and muttering something about how you can't even find a regular cup of coffee anymore because of those crazy city folk and their highfalutin ideas. And men who - at some time or another - heard of the concept of bathing, will be practicing their canned "some of my best friends are gay" speech.
So we're staying the entire weekend in the glorious city of Bakersfield, but fear not. I'm taking my anti-hick spray with me and plan on using it in liberal doses.
| May 17, 2007 08:58am | 
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