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Where's Ripley when you need her?

Some might foolishly assume the large, tender growth on the side of my neck is simply a swollen limph node from this wicked sore throat I've acquired. I, on the other hand, realize this to be an alien embryonic pod growing just below my jawline. At any moment I expect a snot covered, two mouthed creature with an excellent dental plan to burst through my skin, cocoon all my friends and eat my coworkers for a crunchy midnight snack. I wish it would just hurry up; the suspense is killing me.