July 2004

Not For the Faint of Eye

The other night I was adjusting the contact in my right eye. Immediately after I did this it felt like a boulder had crawled into my eye. I couldn't see clearly out of that eye anymore, yet could feel that there was definitely still something in that eye socket. The contact felt crumpled up and lodged in the upper right corner of the socket. I spent 40 minutes trying to find the wayward contact either by visual inspection or with the finger that was digging around in there. The tidal wave of saline solution didn't help, nor did the painful, but insistent blinking. In the end I made an emergency run to the eye doctor just as they were closing. The doctor had a difficult time finding anything, but eventually pulled out my contact in two jagged halves. Now I'm forced to wear glasses for a week while my eye recovers and I get a replacement for the casualty of war that once was my contact.

Dark Night

This week I colored this amazing comic art by J.G. Jones.

Competition

Can you guess what was used for the coloring and shading behind this chess set?

The Feminine Mystique

Now Rachel had taken the household gods and put them inside her camel's saddle and was sitting on them. Laban searched through everything in the tent but found nothing. Rachel said to her father, "Don't be angry, my lord, that I cannot stand up in your presence; I'm having my period." (Genesis 31:34-35 NIV)

Since the beginning of time women have been claiming "feminine problems" to get men to stop asking questions. And, since the beginning of time, men have gullibly responded, "eeewww."

Sounds Kinky to Me

"NMFS Muffs Math For Crab Buyback"
—Alaska Fisherman's Journal, Aug 2004

Unexpected Paisley

This is my latest tie dyeing project. It was once a white tank top that had been washed with something red creating a lovely pale pink. Not being quite that comfortable with my feminine side I decided to transform it into a piece of art. It came out better than I expected.

Word of the Day

angst
n. A feeling of anxiety or apprehension often accompanied by depression.

While Supplies Last

In case you missed it, this was porn weekend on my site. In efforts to provide a full service blog I invited a couple spam-bots to post 1830 comments advertising every possible type of porn available on the web. Sadly this was a limited time offer. Spending about 5 hours deleting comments is just one more of services that we provide here at Synaptic Waste.

Catwoman

I completely recommend seeing every movie expecting it to be absolutely horrible. That was the case when I went to see Catwoman yesterday. I saw it because there are very few movie options in my area, I wanted to see a movie, and I'm a sucker for superhero flicks. Going in with absolutely no hope for enjoyment made for a very enjoyable movie. Reviews all around the net are trashing this film, but I actually had a really good time. I thought the story was interesting and well told. Halle Berry was surprisingly good in her split personality role of Patience Phillips and Catwoman. In fact I enjoyed most of the characters in the film. I thought the concept of a lineage of catwoman based in Egyptian mythology set-up the film nicely and removed the need to be true to the original Catwoman stories. Patience is just another in a long line of Catwomen.

Sadly Catwoman's costume did actually live up to my pessimistic expectations. They had sort of a transition costume that would have worked perfectly throughout the movie. I wish they had left it at that. The holey pants, s&m top, and dorky cat mask just really didn't do it for me. Also, the filmakers relied on a lot of cgi to show our main character leaping around the city like a cat. That was obvious computer work and some of the transitions back to real photography were painful. The movie continued to get more hokey as the "villian" of the film is kinda turned into a super villian because of the skin care product she used... I hate when that happens.

So... while I enjoyed the movie, don't get your hopes up. There was a lot lacking in the film, but if you go in expecting crap you just might enjoy it as much as I did. In fact, this is a movie that I might actually choose to own. Rating: 3/5

Does This Shampoo Make My Butt Look Big?

A friend and I went to Soldotna today which has much better shopping than Homer. We spent probably an hour in the beauty care isle discussing which products were best suited our hair and complexion. We left the store with a basket filled all kinds of conditioning, cleansing, and scrubbing goodness.

We are soooo not your typical males.

Innocence?

This creepy piece of art came from a copy I found in the the garbage at a church where I used to teach piano. It was a mostly black copy with this doll's face and hand showing. I'm sure that some kid was playing with the copier, but it seemed to me to have some deeper, unsettling meaning. I took the copy and added some texture and color. Now it serves as a disturbing piece of art to fill space on my blog. I love it. It makes me want to play with a copier/scanner and other 3D objects.

Tree Fort Upgrade

A friend and I built a lot of tree forts growing up. We considered ourselves quite the industrious little builders. Well this week we are helping his mom build a shed. It's a major step up from working with the scraps we found laying around the yard and this time we get to use power tools. They framed in the floor last night. Tonight I had fun helping them finish that up and build two walls. I'm kinda sad that this will be done by the weekend. I may have to find more such projects to keep myself busy.

At the Beach

This is a comglomerate of several photos I took at the beach this past week.

And the Winner Is...

Valette came down to Homer this weekend to 'cheer me up.' It turns out my depression is stronger than her cheeriness as I'm dragging her down with me. Oh yeah. Who's the man?

Slow Boat Got an Upgrade

I shipped boxes from Washington via Media Mail & Parcel Post. These are quoted to take 3-4 weeks to Alaska. I got all but one of them today, 10 calendar days after they were mailed and 2 weeks sooner than I was expecting.

Existence

Welcome to Hicksville

Homer may be an extremely active artist community, but it still has load of hick elements. A friend has a target sitting at the end of the hall in his house so he can do bb gun practice while watching the tv. Even worse, he owns a three bedroom house: the master bedroom, the spare bedroom, and the fish drying room. <hick>

On the Path

I made it to Alaska in a surreal state of shock and depression. I spent two days in Anchorage visiting my godson and his family as well as my brother's family. That was all really great. Ron, my childhood friend, drove me down to Homer today. We had an awesome time shopping, driving, and talking. It was so awesome to get to spend so much time with him after years of living in different parts of the country. I'm kinda like a giddy school girl with the thought of getting to spend so much time with him now that we are both, miraculously, living in Homer. Driving into Homer was odd and I couldn't bring myself to accept that this was going to be home for awhile. Getting to my parents' house was equally odd, but refreshingly familiar. My mom and I chatted for a few hours. She is so amazingly wise and wonderful. I'm going to love being close to her again. Through conversations with her and others I feel very confirmed that this is were I'm supposed to be right now. That is very helpful. While I'm definitely depressed, I don't think the full reality of the separation has really hit me yet. The next few weeks should prove interesting as I'm sure I'll find a whole gamut of emotions to wade through. Fortunately I can take it easy and be good to myself.

Campylobacter Nightmare

It was a food poisoning fiesta at my in-laws this evening. We had chicken kabobs. It was a make-it-yourself affair with the marinated raw chicken right there on the dinner table. K made sure to give everyone a plate for the raw making and a separate plate for the eating. Even with that plan in action I sat in horror as raw chicken marinade was sloshed on raw food, napkins, forks, hands, door knobs, etc. I protected my little space and washed utensils as I went, but I was nearly sick thinking of all the bacteria going into people's mouths. The kabobs were awesome tasting, but I vote that next time the kabobs be made in the kitchen with much washing of hands before eating.

So It Begins

Tomorrow I leave. I leave with a lot of sadness, guilt, and uncertainty. I'll be living in my home town for awhile. It'll be interesting to see if I hate living there as much as I have thought for so many years. My best friend is living there at the moment so that will be awesome. It also puts me closer to my sister again, though I fear not close enough. I'll get to see my mom as often as I want and I get to be on the ocean once again. I pray this is the right decision and that this time in my home town will be a time of healing and perspective.

Serves Him Right

Danier Leather. That's just funny.

Body Worlds

Um, eew.

// my personal research assistant: toren //

Things I've Learned

All of my earthly possessions fit into 13 boxes and 4 of those are just my piano keyboard & accessories.

1.5 cubic feet of books weigh about 60lbs.

3 cubic feet of books is just a bad idea.

Appetizing

Man that sure looks like a turd in a basket.

A Day With the Girls

Today I watched my baby niece while I highlighted my mother-in-law's hair and mine as well. It was a lot of fun.

Hare Ball

"I didn't lick the bunny's butt. Did you lick the bunny's butt?

"I think he licked the bunny's butt."

A conversation about our dog's fetish with k's stuffed bunny.