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Jr. High Innuendos

There are everyday words which can have obvious sexual connotation. Words such as hard, long, and wet (makes me giggle just typing them). Then there are words that would seem perfectly harmless to an average person, but would be construed in sexual ways by jr. high boys... and people who think like them. My sister, her husband, and I spent most of the afternoon on Sunday listing mundane words which could sound sexual. Here are a just few of them:

tight, hot, moisture, kitten, firm, knob, tip, peak, mound, flesh, squeal, lubricate, bind, tongue, push, red, bulge, rub, fill, explode, rod, staff, lick, melon, round, damp, flower, jerk, gazelle, sticky, gooey, lips, mount, top, bite, position, entrance, bounce, in, mambo, pop, edible, button, ram, whack, poke, swing, nibble, rubber, wiggle, slip, throat, and engorge (my personal favorite).

You might be surprised at how many sexual innuendos we could find in everyday conversation. I know that I should be ashamed, but, hey, the average person only has a handful of words that relate to sex; I have a whole dictionary full of them!

True Confessions: In a particularly low part of my youth, my best friend and I used to sit in church and find sexual innuendos in the hymn titles. It's not like we were just doing this during the singing either. We passed many a dull sermon that way until the explosive laughter—which we tried to pass off as coughing fits—earned us special seats next to my parents. How I avoided a lightning bolt with that little venture I'll never know.